It’s called Cuffing Season. Cuffing season projects that we are actually much more content being single in summer months and much less content with our singleness as the weather gets colder. I don’t think the cooler temps alone are to blame, and theories about this phenomenon says school calendar, daylight savings time and pending holidays are a factor, too. Yet, Cuffing season runs from the first fall of leaves until the first blooms of spring, and it is upon us now!
The theory that seems to resonate with me the most is that we likely get into this mode early on in life because of school calendars. Summer is for freedom and random times with friends, Fall is for buckling down and focusing more on connection when we are trapped in small places with those we love most. But regardless of why it exists, there is something inside our brains that clicks and causes us to wonder just who we will be keeping us warm this winter.
You may be rolling your eyes and thinking “oh great…I will have as much luck dating as I did this time last year!” But what if you could change that? What if you could actually put a few new dating tips into your pocket, find new methods to connect to others, build your confidence in the process and become a better “picker?” Guess what? I believe you can and I’ve shared a few below!
Cozy up on Sunday Night: The highest traffic times for online dating site is on Sunday night. Make it a practice to block out a little time to get on your apps, see who is new and send some messages. Ideally, you should log in every day to get the best results, but make it part of your ritual to read some profiles as you look to the week ahead. Also, the busiest day of the year for online dating is the Sunday after New Year’s Day, so mark that one on your calendar, you’ve already got a date with your phone that day!
Fall-la-la: Dating profiles should be about painting word pictures that make the reader know what it’s like to spend time with you…and it would be great to include some FALL activities into that scenario. Talk about an autumn walk, pumpkin pie or whatever it is you like to do in this weather. Also, make sure and mention cuddling…after all, that’s the real driver in what makes everyone want to get cuffed in cuffing season.
Experience the Season: Get out and do something…there are all kinds of festivals, craft fairs, ghost tours, corn mazes and more. Join a meetup for some of these activities or grab a couple of friends and get to it. When you are out, put your phone down and make eye contact…conversations with cute strangers rarely start without it!
Throw on those boots: For men and women, buy a few new pieces to your wardrobe so you feel great when you are out at the festival or on that first date. For the ladies, nothing says you’re rocking winter-wear like a great pair of tall boots with a high heel! Don't forget the confidence...that's better than anything you put on.
Learn something new: Self-improvement is sexy! Get out and learn something new…about yourself…Take that cooking or photography class or join a meditation group. If you want to understand more about the way you are wired, go see an astrologer who specializes in singles like my friend Philip at Black Unikorn. If you need help with your dating game, visit my meetup, attend my seminars and talk to other singles about how they work it. Or if you know you need to work on a few things before dating again, there’s still time to start my program now and be dating around the time Thanksgiving rolls around. (Women in my transformational program don’t date until week 9, which will be during the most romantic season of the year… I have limited openings, don’t miss out!)
Give yourself a gift this year…do some self-care, build some confidence in a new way and invest in your future love.
An old dog can learn some new tricks…I mean skills! Use these tips to get yourself cuffed this season. I was thinking just this morning how I feel my real calling in life is to help people love others better…that doesn’t have to be kept to dating. What I find is those who really dig in, shift their minds, change their old habits that weren’t working for them, end up finding more love in all parts of their life, and honestly, it usually starts with how they loves themselves and being committed to connecting with others.
So Fall in love with yourself this Autumn, enjoy the season wholeheartedly and I have a feeling you may just be cuffed before Valentine’s Day!